Sadly this year saw the death of Micheal Winner. Loved by many for his old fashioned values & writing in The Sunday Times. His twitter account still lives on, but is now run by his wife, Geraldine Lynton-Edwards. A solider to the end, with his 20+ years for writing his column; “Winner’s Dinners”, last entry came a little over a month before his passing.

In better news; Marina O’Loughlin finally got the break many had been calling for, and was snapped up by The Guardian, after the departure of John Lanchester. This in turn left a vacancy at The Metro, where Ms O’Loughlin had been based for 6years. Step forward, Joe Warwick, one of the instigators of ‘The Worlds 50 Best Restaurants’ into void.

During the three years this list has been going, the Mr Angry of restaurant critics, Giles Coren, has blocked me on the social media site. In fact, I doubt he cares about this list at all. But he’s now been toppled by Grace Dent (new entry at 1), the relative new kid on the block when it comes to restaurant critics. Another new entry is Tom Parker Bowles, who writes for The Mail on Sunday.

-post-

But in an age where baking has been the fashionable past time of recent years, that isn’t enough any more. There needs to be flavours & techniques as well as style & substance. Do a simple thing well, rather than a complex one mediocre, has been my mantra for a few years now and bread making is no different. Such is the importance of bread with restaurants, many a great chef has pontificated on the subject:

Former 3 Michelin starred chef, Pierre Koffmann allegedly said:

Serve good bread and all will be well.

Whilst American legend Julia Child, is quoted as saying:

How can a nation be great if its bread tastes like Kleenex?

Plenty of chefs will tell you that you need to love and nurture the dough, as this get transferred to the bread, after all it’s a living breathing thing.

For most of the recipes below, you will need some ferment, which I’ve described how to make in a previous bread post: How can a nation be great if its bread tastes like Kleenex?

What dried onions look like.

Onion bread

• 1350g Strong bread flour
• 50g Fresh yeast
• 25g Sea salt
• 25g Sugar
• 50g dripping / butter (if making for vegetarians), diced into small cubes
• 250g Ferment
• 900ml Water
• 100g Dried onions

Combine in a large bowl (or mixer bowl, if you have one) the flour, salt, sugar and dripping. Thoroughly mix together, rubbing in the dripping as you would for pastry.

Add the dried onions & the ferment, loosely incorporate before gradually adding the water & kneading for 10minutes. The dough should be slightly wetter than normal, this is what you’re looking for.

Place in a large bowl, so the dough will have room to prove. Clingfilm the bowl tightly all the way around with multiple layers.

Prove overnight in the fridge. The reason the dough needs to be slightly wetter than normal & the overnight proving, is so that the dried onions can absorb the extra moisture & permeate the flavour through the dough.

The following morning, remove the dough from the fridge & knock back (knock all the air out of it & give it a good stretch). Next cut & weigh into appropriate size lumps, obviously these will affect the cooking times. For individual rolls I normally go for 55g-60g which will take 11minutes at 220°C, in a non-fan assisted oven. For 1lb (450g) loaves, 230°C for 35-45minutes.

Roll the dough to the require shape, being careful not to over work it. Cover with a warm damp cloth or lightly greased cling film to prove for the 2nd time. When the dough has doubled in size then it’s ready for the preheated oven.

• Rolls at 55-60g – 11minutes at 220°C
• Loaves at 450g – 35-45minutes at 230°C

An extension of this recipe is the ‘Cheese & Onion’ rolls I tweeted. For this flavour add 200g of Gruyere cheese & 1 tsp of paprika after the overnight proving stage & knead into the dough.

Cheese & onion rolls

Mini Lentil loaves

• 600g Strong bread flour
• 50g Granary flour
• 500g Cooked lentils du pays
• 200g Ferment
• 30g Fresh yeast
• 7g Sea salt
• 50g Honey
• 300ml Warm water
• 1 Dsp wholegrain mustard

Lentil mini loaves, please click for a larger image

Preheat oven to 220°C

Dissolve the honey & yeast in the warm water. Cling film and leave to start to ferment (bubbles rising & a foam appearing on the surface).

Combine in a large bowl (or mixer bowl, if you have one) the flours, salt, lentils & grain mustard, mix until full incorporated. Then add the ferment & gradually add the fermenting honey/water mix.

Knead for 10minutes, then prove in a warm place covered with either clingfilm or a damp cloth.

When the dough has doubled in size, knock back and cut into 55-60g size portions. Put into lightly greased mini loaf tins, if you don’t have these, try using a muffin tray instead; same taste, different shape.

Again, prove until double in size then bake for 11minutes. Once cooked, remove from the tins to prevent getting a soggy bottom (nobody likes a soggy bottom,   ).

Pain de Ruecht

• 290g Ferment
• 950ml Warm water
• 10g Fresh yeast
• 1.2kg White strong flour
• 300g Rye flour
• 30g Sea salt
• 30g Fennel seeds

Preheat oven to 220°C.

Combine all the ingredients, except the water & the fennel seeds.

Gradually add the water and knead into a dough for about 10minutes.

Place in a large bowl, so the dough will have room to prove. Clingfilm the bowl tightly all the way around with multiple layers & prove overnight in the fridge.

The following morning, knock back, divide & shape between 4, 1lb loaf tins. Brush with milk and scatter the dough with the fennel seeds. Prove the dough for a 2nd time until doubled in size then bake for 30 minutes.

Whilst I was in this bread making phase, a few people asked how I made the piccolo white rolls. It is quite hard to describe, particularly on Twitter, so I roped in the services of a commis to take some pictures whilst I rolled the bread. I do hope this is of some use.

Please click to see a larger image

I’ve eaten at The Clarence before, a number of years ago and definitely in the pre-blog era. I remember thinking to myself at the time how good it was, if a trifle expensive. But the world has moved on; we’ve endured a double dip recession and value for money, in whatever eatery you frequent now has to be key to survival. So when I heard earlier this year, that the long serving Head chef of Gidleigh Park was leaving, to steer the ship of Abode Exeter, I thought it was an excellent opportunity to see how things had evolved.

Now I’ll be the first to admit I was a bit naughty; normally I’d book a table in advance, but as there was only me & I was doing some shopping in Exeter anyway; I thought I’d chance it. I duly turned up in reception on the dot of noon to inquire if they had an available table for lunch. Not a problem, I was guided through to the the restaurant by a very pleasant member of staff into an expanse of polished dark woods, white linen and glinting shiny cutlery. The danger of dining on your own is that you can become bored in between courses; ear wigging becomes a sport, as does guessing what each of your dining neighbours may do for a living etc. To combat this, I brought my notes for the ‘Worlds 50 Best‘ post to polish up, before actually writing out the entry properly.

After being shown to my table I was given the menu, there are a couple of options:

• Lunch, 2courses and £14.50 & 3courses at £19.50
• A La Carte, starters around £10, mains around £20+ and desserts £10
• Weekly changing Tasting menu, seven courses plus coffee & petit fours for £60 plus £36 for the matching wines.

The sheer value for money which appears to be on offer with the lunch menu is just staggering, and so my choice was made.

At £1.50 on the menu, many will baulk at paying the price, but don’t. The breads are excellent examples of each of their various types.

There was a slice from a sundried tomato loaf which was packed with the intensity of the dried fruit, with smokey under tones; a individual piccolo white roll & a small bun, which when cracked open through the wafer thin crust, revealed a light fluffy grey/blue interior. Although the taste was more akin to a traditional white roll, I just had to admire the levels of technique to achieve bread like this.

In my time I’ve seen & eaten enough terrines to know a good one, which has been made with skilled hands; & the ones which have been thrown together in hast and then had any remaining life pressed out of them under 20kilos of butter in the fridge overnight. At The Clarence however, the chicken terrine is a delight. The meat is moist, flavoursome and sits nestling in a clear jelly; which adds a level of delicacy to the dish. One of the things that drew me to ordering it was the mentioned ‘egg yolk vinaigrette’; intriguing is the best adjective to describe this. More of a dressing/purée than what I would call a vinaigrette, but hey, each to their own. The accompanying asparagus salad would be a loose interpretation, yet it was so exacting in execution: sweet pea shoots; asparagus spears in various forms; the Hansel & Gretel trail of cooked parmesan crumbs adding a much needed texture.   An excellent dish; with balances of textures, seasonings, acidity, seasonality and colour; combined with deft touches in the execution.

There is a school of thought that:

What grows together, goes together

Braised shoulder of Lamb, wild garlic purée, confit tomatoes and tapenade jus for main should have been a resounding success then. Well, unlike the constituent parts it was a bit meh, so to speak. The braised Lamb was: juicy; well seasoned; tender; it paired well with either the wild garlic purée or the confit tomatoes, but not all three together. The confit tomatoes were more of a demi sec or semi dried affair, rather than the confit versions I’d either done myself or eaten elsewhere. This just served to intensify the acidity which wasn’t really required to cut through any level of fat or richness that might have been present. Coupled with the fact that the plate was far too hot, so it reduced the tapenade jus on the plate making it something akin to licking a postage stamp, was making it some what of a let down.

The side order of vegetables at £3.50 are a bug bear of mine. I mean really, just look at the picture below & tell me that it’s enough as a main course portion? It just isn’t, so why not adjust the menu pricing accordingly & have done with it? Whilst the elements individually were all fine, combined they just didn’t gel; just because it’s the current trend to forage & the season for wild garlic, it doesn’t go with everything. Maybe fondant potato or celeriac would have been better choices, it wasn’t hideous by any stretch of the imagination, but after such a promising starter, the main course failed to deliver.

There is a lot to be said for the way chefs do crème brûlée. There is the classical cook in a ramekin & then glaze, then there is the more refined freestanding version. It’s a difficult balancing trick to do the latter; too many eggs and the end result will be eggy & too hard. Alternatively, have a lack of eggs and the mix wont set, defeating the object of the exercise.

The pastry team at The Royal Clarence have got the balance spot on; each brûlée is cooked in a ring and thus give that slight wobble in the center, which is desirable in cooked custards. Partnering the creme brûlée was the modern classic; rhubarb, in various forms: Poached; puréed; jellied & frozen (in the shape of sorbet). All added differing levels of  sweetness and acidity; both of which cut through the richness of vanilla scented custard. After the slight disappointment of the main course, the creme brûlée put the meal back on track to the more exacting standards I’d come to expect from a Micheal Caines establishment.

After a fine double espresso & a selection of petit fours: a mini gateau opera (one of my personal favourite desserts) & a pâte du fruit, came the time of reckoning. There’s now doubting that on the surface of it £19.50 for 3courses of food at this aspirational standard is incredible value for money. But the elephant in the room is the little extras that come at a price, the £3.50 vegetables are a point in case, just add them to the main course price & supply a more appropriate garnish, rather than just generic vegetables.

Service is a well oiled machine, easily striking the difficult balance between informal yet not over friendly; and professional. I wouldn’t want this to give you the impression that the staff are off-handish or aloof, they aren’t. Infact, as I watched during the course of service they measured each table perfectly in terms of interacting with the guests: the two men having a business meeting, or the table of four having a family lunch together, each received different yet professional service. As with Gidleigh Park, the property most synonymous with the Mr Caines, the front house completes the package making the meal a more harmonious affair, in contrasted to the juxatposed efforts in quite a few hotel restaurants.

So to the bill. When people say it’s the little things that mount up,they aren’t kidding:

3Courses @ £19.50

Double espresso & petits fours £2.95

Seasonal vegetables £3.50

Basket of bread £1.50

Charitable donation 50pence

Service charge @12%

Total £31.30

On the surface of it £19.50 for 3 courses is great value for money, but then start adding on half a bottle of wine plus all the extras above and you’ve breached £50. Which isn’t particularly great, there are wine offerings by the glass or you could stick to tap water which is also offered, but why would you want to? And here in lies the problem, the two Michelin starred Le Gavroche from the Roux dynasty in London, has a lunch menu. For £52.60 of your hard earned cash you’ll receive:

• Amuse bouche (pre starter)
• 3courses
• Coffee & petits fours
• Bottle of water
• ½ Bottle of wine (per person)

This offer isn’t just a one off, the business lunch at Le Gavroche has been in place for years & this is the fundamental problem that places like Abode Exeter face. I had a good meal, there’s no doubting that, great? No, & would I go again? Yes, probably; but the aforementioned elephant in the room has to be addressed for this to be a more regular visit for me than once every 6 years.

Highlights for June food festivals are:

• Slow Food UK week, 1st – 9th June
• Cheltenham Food and drink festival, 14th -16th June
• Love Gourmet week, Eire, 1st – 9th June
• Isle of Man Queenie festival, 29th – 30th June

June Food festivals, click for the Food festival calender page

Every month, the Foodies100 analyses and ranks all of the parent (Food) blogs in our community. Our results are designed to measure blogs based on popularity, engagement and influence.

Since that blogger visited, I briefly rose to 52 before sinking back to my more usual position just outside the top 100. The other blogger sank into the oblivion of the top 500 as the badge on her site said, before bumping up into the top 250 this month.

Now if you’re reading this and think ‘what has all this got to do with breakfast recipes?’. Well, as part of the deal bringing the aforementioned blogger to my former client, was that they would get 3 articles published by her; according to the owner. One of those articles it appears, was about Granola, which she’d had for breakfast. Now as I was in charge of the pastry section & responsible for some of the breakfast mise en place (advanced preparation) including Granola, and on duty the morning when the blogger asked for the recipe; I can tell you what she has published, isn’t it.

Normally I wouldn’t be so public about another blogger like this, but quite frankly I just don’t understand how this has happened. How did my former client’s PR company think it was a good idea to give a billy no mark blogger a £300 a night package, on the proviso that they’d get 3 articles out of her; which 1 is about their breakfast granola, for which she doesn’t even have the recipe for?

Deep breath; and moving on. So I’ve decided to do a post on breakfast recipes, often a meal missed by bloggers & food writers in terms of sharing recipes. So here are some of mine, including the fabled granola recipe, enjoy.

Breakfast Granola

• 500 Demerera sugar
• 25g Muscavado sugar
• 40g Honey
• 35g Golden syrup
• 60g Butter
• 100g Porridge oats
• 75g Dessicated coconuts
• 70g Pecan nuts
• 45g Flaked almonds
• 30g Peeled pistachio nuts
• 50g Hazelnuts
• 50g Brazil nuts
• 30g Sunflower seedds
• Grated zest of 1 orange

Combine all the dry ingredients, separately combine all the sugars with the butter and the orange zest & bring to the boil.

Mix with the dry ingredients  and bake for 15-20 minutes at 150ºC. Store in an air tight jar when cool.

Breakfast Scones

• 150g flour
• 30g Butter
• 1g Salt
• 11g Sugar
• 7g Baking powder
• 90g Buttermilk

Rub the flour, baking powder, salt, sugar and butter together. Once rubbed in, gradually add the milk until all combined to make the dough.

Wrap in clingfilm and rest in the fridge for 30minutes.

Roll out 3.5-4cm thick and cut into 4cm squares, then dip the top into egg wash and then sugar, place onto tray; egg wash and sugar facing upwards. Bake at 200ºC until golden brown.

Croissant Vannille

• 1000g Flour
• 280g Sugar
• 800g Butter
• 200g Ground almonds
• 200g Ground hazelnuts
• 2 Vanilla pods, split
• 3 Eggs

Cream butter, sugar & vanilla together slowly until light and fluffy.
Beat the eggs & add slowly. (If curdles/splits add heat to recover).
Then mix in sieved flour, ground almonds and ground hazelnuts.
Roll into small croissant shaped pieces and refrigerate
Bake at 180-200ºC for 10-12minutes.

NOTE:

Big thanks to my Twitter follower, Colm Carmody for the Croissant picture. Follow him here

Yogurt & Compote jars

Compote:

• 400ml Water
• 300g Caster sugar
• 75ml White wine
• 1 Vanilla pod
• 300g Rhubarb
• 1kg Fresh halved strawberries (stalks removed)

Bring water, sugar and split vanilla pod to the boil.
Add the chopped rhubarb and cover with a piece of greaseproof paper, and reduce heat.
When slightly softened, remove from the heat and add strawberries; leave to cool in own syrup.

Yogurt:

• 300g Greek style natural yogurt
• 1 Vanilla pod, split

Combine the two ingredients together. Steep with the used pod in the yogurt overnight, then remove.

Finishing the jars: ¼ fill the jars with chilled compote, then top up with the vanilla yogurt. Chill overnight.

Banjo Sandwich

This is a sandwich from my Dad ( hi Dad, you’re getting a mention again), and I’ve tweeted variants of it quite recent.

• 2 Eggs, fried but still runny
• 2 Rashers of bacon, grilled to required crispiness or personal preference.
• Heinz Tomato ketchup
• 2 slices of white bread, buttered.

Fry the eggs in a knob of butter (I’d recommend a blinis pan for this), whilst simultaneously grilling the bacon.

Whilst waiting for the 2 aforementioned items to cook, butter the bread.

When the bacon & the eggs are ready, lay the bacon rashers first, then the eggs and top with a good dollop of tommy K. DO NOT CUT IN HALF.

Now consume. This sandwich gets its name from the action where the various juices & sauce will, at some point end up on your chest; causing you to do the natural thing; curse & lightly rub it – making you look like you’re playing an air banjo.

There are three key things to remember when eating this breakfast treat.

1. Don’t wear any form of clothing you value.
2. The eggs & bacon need to be hot during assembly.
3. Do not in any scenario toast the bread, this will change the structural integrity, making it a bacon butty!
4. Use proper butter, NOT marg or its variants.

Sunday morning breakfast at Chez Hermes.

Chris is well capable of getting a star in his own right.

On top of this ChefHermes.com has managed to obtain a copy of the new menu. Clearly Mr Denny has been empowered to play to his strengths, and has wiped the slate clean and started again. Gone is the River café style Italian menu & food, and in comes a more contemporary style of food, featuring dishes such as:

• Roasted chicken, buckwheat waffle, sea kale,salted lemons, garlic crisps  £22
• Flat iron steak, salt baked celeriac, shitaki (sic) granola, confit banana shallot, miso butterscotch £18.50
• Sweet potato ice cream, jamacian ginger cake, lime meringue, sour cream  £7
• Peanut butter macroon, passion fruit sorbet £7

The version of the menu I’ve seen is a simple six starters; six main course & five desserts:

This morning news has dropped into my inbox concerning the man at the helm for The Hamborough. It is a chef by the name of Darren Beevers and former employers, according to his LinkedIn page include:

• Pollen Street Social, 1Michelin star
• The Capital Hotel, 2Michelin stars
• Le Poussin, 1Michelin star
• Chez Bruce, 1Michelin star
• Club Gascon, 1Michelin star

Whilst Mr Beevers only Head chef position has been at Club Gascon, & for not as long as he’d like to make out on his LinkedIn page; he does seem to fit the bill as somebody that could potentially retain the all important French tyre maker’s star. As yet, a start date for Mr Beevers is still unknown, as is who, if anybody is manning the stoves currently at The Hamborough itself.

Whilst I dare say both Mr Beevers & Mr Denny can cook and run kitchens, they aren’t in the same league as the former two Michelin starred chef, John Campbell, to move The Hamborough Group & the Winter Gardens project forward. So clearly this is a change of tack from Mr Sussmilch, is he going to appoint a group operations director, as this would probably make more sense?

As ever with a breaking post like this I’d like to offer my best wishes for all concerned with The Hamborough Group and their future plans.

Genesis of the group started by owner Kevin Sussmilch with a chef by the name of David Thomson (FYI Debby Robinson who commented on the ‘On the Wight’ story, they aren’t related principally because, although Robert’s & David’s surnames sound the same, they are actually spelt differently). Later acquisitions followed: Pond Café; Villa Lavinina ; Villa Apartment & more recently Ventnor Winter Gardens, which was purchased for £1.

The former two Michelin starred chef has utilised his time away from the stoves well, as my post about his pop-up at South Lodge last year has shown. After talking to Mr Campbell, I always get the feeling I should be trying harder, & to re-assess my thinking, such is his infectious thirst for knowledge & training. I personally felt that he was the right person to develop the Winter Gardens project into the next phase. This isn’t meant to paint Robert Thompson in a bad light in any way, he’s a wonderful chef & incredibly talented; but Mr Campbell has more experience with new openings & operations of this size and magnitude.

The Michelin starred protege of Annie & Germain Schwab has achieved more in his career than most chefs could dream of:

• Head chef of 2 Michelin starred Winteringham fields at 22.
• Caterer Acorn winner (High achievers under 30).
• Michelin star in own right at 23.
• The past 5 years growing, promoting & day to day running of The Hamborough group.

Hard to believe that he’s only 30! Many have commented on the Michelin star, if there is a credible appointment (believed to be announced next week) & it can be inspected in time, then there is a good chance that The Hamborough will retain its star. Michelin have always stated publicly that the star is awarded to the property not the chef; although consistency really is the name of the game here.

Mr Sussmilch has virtually been vilified in the Isle of Wight media & some of the short sighted people who comment on articles in the local media. Why? For the simple crime of he’d like to stay out of the limelight, coupled with their inability to extract information which is in the public domain, on the web, for free. He has had a rough ride because his name of appears at Companies House attached to a now dissolved company Totaltronic (UK) Ltd; and two relatively new companies Wight House Ltd and Wight Hot Ltd. This wouldn’t have stopped him being a sole trader, which means he could have a company and yet not have to file any returns in the public domain.

So what else is Mr Sussmilch connected to? Well he owns a registered trademark for Shox and his email address is linked to the following domains:

• closbeylesse.c*
• destinationventnor.c*
• domainedelabbaye.c*
• ventnormarina.c*
• ventnorsailingclub.c*
• ventnoryachtclub.c*
• wightbread.c*

A couple of things that stand out; firstly how several of the domain names all hinge around Mr Sussmilch’s favourite past time of sailing (he’s an accomplished Sigma 38 sailor with his yacht Mefisto).  So to me, he has a long term plan for the area, which surely can only be good for Ventnor and the wider community.The other domains refer to wines or an auberge in France and a company’s website which sells gluten free products to the NHS on the Isle of Wight. This doesn’t necessarily mean that he owns those companies or has any interest in the domains. It just means his email address is connect to those domains. I also discovered that in his school years Mr Sussmilch (or Sausage as he was known) once went to school in a pink leather suit, in his native Sunderland. In fact, the address that is connected to Mr Sussmilch appears on Google Street view very much as a modest semi detached house in a tree lined street, some what belying the multi-millionaire he’s perceived to be. But as this address is only linked to his domains & email, it may well be that he doesn’t actually live there.

When the original John Campbell press release came out, much of the commentators, on the Isle of Wight in particular focused on the word ‘acquired’. There was an element of back tracking when somebody from within the Hamborough Group denied that Mr Sussmilch had sold up. Yes, there is no doubting this has been a PR disaster, not only in terms of the deal falling through, but the way it has been handled. Many have questioned veracity in how the chefs in this post, have been portrayed: Owners?;Chef-Patron?; Head Chef? and so the list goes on. A new chef has already been named for Pond cafe, who has a good background & quite frankly looks over qualified for the job in hand, welcome to Ventnor Mr Denny. I’ve been told that there should be an announcement next week concerning The Hambourough itself & who’ll be manning the stoves there. Maybe the search will continue to fill the £90,000 a year post that Mr Sussmilch has earmarked for a high flying Michelin starred chef or will he change tack?

At the start of the post I said that today 16th May was one of the seminal dates in the Hamborough’s history; this is because today is Robert Thompson’s last day. Like I’ve said in previous posts Robert is one of the nice guys, he’s always made time for me, we’ve had had some wonderful meals there and under his stewardship, The Hamborough came to mean alot to my partner & I. Hopefully he’ll take a break, then come back better for it; good luck for the future Rob.

As ever with these type of post, I’d like to wish everybody concerned all the best for the future with your endeavours.

But what makes this situation worse, is the impact that a wealthy owner has on the staff who he employs, or doesn’t as it appears the current case is at Heckfield. A recent rumour has arrived, that virtually all the staff have been relieved of their duties; with the notable exception of former Michelin starred chef Skye Gyngell (& an unnamed Marketing guy), who continues to recruit for a restaurant which doesn’t even have a site yet. The brief given to property agents is apparently:

• 3,000+ sq. feet
• In the area of; Notting Hill, Holland Park, Ladbroke Grove, Chelsea, Fulham or Kensington.
• Outdoor area suitable for serving food.

And yet, despite looking for over 11months, nothing. Really? Nothing suitable in West London at all? The really scarey part of all this is that Heckfield is hemorrhaging money; current estimates just for salaries is somewhere in the region of £1.5million a year. ChefHermes.com has also been told, despite whatever the PR spin is on Ms Gyngell’s appointment to Heckfield, she isn’t actually contractually bound to ever cook there.

Putting aside the kitchen & food operations debacle, Heckfield also suffered the indignity of the building contractors ‘walking off site’. Could this be down to the owner’s constant changes to the building etc? ChefHermes.com understands that the original plan was to open the hotel in phases, with the initial opening to be May 2010; that date is, but a distant memory. If the builders do return & the owners finally agree on what they actually want, you may see Heckfield Place open in its entirety in April 2015, a full five years behind schedule.

In recent times there has been this train of thought that reducing VAT in the hospitality industry will somehow stimulate the economy, as if it’s some kind of silver bullet. Many of its supporters claim that we should have parity with Europe. But have they looked at the bigger picture? No, I doubt it.

The main supporters of cutting VAT often cite how,

Germany, the powerhouse of the Eurozone.

Has reduced VAT (or their equivalent) on accommodation to 7%. Great, but how are they paying for it? Well, in the UK, you get about £9,500 tax free allowance; in Germany  their zero tax rate is £6880. So already a tax cut to help businesses looks like it’s going to be funded by its employees. But it gets even worse, what these advocates of the German system always seem to fail to mention, is that the next tier of  taxation had a 4.9% increase for this current financial year. So again: trainees; kitchen porters; waiters and bar staff are going to be funding this. Yes, in Germany you can earn more; about £12,500 more until you reach their top tier at £44,639, but don’t forget you’ll also have to pay an addition to income tax; solidarity tax, which is capped at 5.5% of your income tax.

The irony of the situation is this, & supporters of the cut won’t like me for saying this; even if this cut happened it would only go as far as to balance the books & increase profits. Very little money would be seen by the employees, and if anybody doubts this, have a look in just about any kitchen & see how many times commis chefs on minimum wages are doing chef de partie jobs. I’m talking from personal experience here & I see it all too often. The hospitality industry has got to get past this attitude of relying on its staff’s goodwill.

In my letter to The Caterer I used the figure of £1.2billion which HMRC would lose out on if a cut actually took place (as cited by Dermot King from Bourne Leisure). But the fact of the matter is this; supporters of the cut can’t actually quantify a figure. The same week my letter was published, The Caterer ran a story about a lobbying group called the VAT club, run by French entrepreneur, Jacques Borel. Mr Borel claims that

cutting VAT would create 670,000 jobs,

but, and here is the kicker; HMRC would lose between £5.5b & £7.8b!

Great, so the assumption from the 5% VAT movement, is that it MIGHT create jobs (as there is no actual firm evidence to support this), & yet they expect HMRC and thus the wider population to stump up the deficit of anywhere between £1.2b and £7.8b. I’ll put this into context of what this massive amount of money buys you:

• 3 US nuclear submarines or
• 5 Boeing 787 – 9 Dreamliners or
• 9 Wembly Stadiums or
• 18 Shards, the tallest building in the Euro-zone or
• 312 New academy schools or
• 31-260 New Hospitals (costs are varied) 

And here lies the flaw in any argument to reduce VAT. Who is going to pay for it? We already have growth better than any other sector in the economy, so why would HMRC decide to reduce that revenue stream? Even if, and it’s a big if, HMRC cut VAT, would the extra hypothetical 670,000 jobs contribute anything close to the £7.8b deficit caused by creating their jobs? No, primarily because those jobs will be minimum wage. There is already a shortage of skilled people within hospitality, to support that statement;  if there wasn’t, then why is there such a Medusa effect with recruitment companies?

Ultimately my view is that cutting VAT would be a too politically painful pill to swallow, you just can’t expect Joe Bloggs public to support an industry, which is viewed as a luxury item and be seen to be getting a 75% cut in in its VATable rate; and then asking them to pay for it with either higher taxes or cuts to public services.

See here for the original letter in The Caterer

•  Connemara Mussel festival, Eire
• Grillstock, Bristol
• Christchurch food & wine festival, Dorset
• Falmouth fish festival, Cornwall

Along with:

• Doughnut week 11th – 18th
• National Sandwich week  12th – 18th
• English wine week 25th – 2nd June

For further information, please visit the Food festival calender  page.

Now I know this site hasn’t been the biggest fan of the way the World’s 50 Best list is constructed & some of its obvious gaping flaws; but the one thing you can’t knock is the relentless polished PR push that the 50 Best machine exudes. In fact, last year saw the release of Asia’s  50 Best, probably after widespread calls that the globe’s largest inhabited continent wasn’t particularly well represented in the main list. A chance meeting with a journalist from the World’s 50 Best camp at a press event opened the channel for dialog. The upshot of the conversation was, that maybe my expectations where too high (collating & verifying some 900+ judges bills is a tremendous task & virtually impossible),  but they could see my point concerning transparency.

There have been a number of negative news stories surrounding the World’s 50 Best, with several credible journalists throwing their toys out of the pram in more ways than one. I think I’ve documented most of them particularly well on this blog, so I’m not going to re-hash them for you, despite how much you love it.

So first up, probably the biggest tip I’ve got. Many of you will have noticed in my tweets during the Noro-virus outbreak at Noma, that there was an implication that the Copenhagen restaurant would fall from the summit of World’s 50 Best. My sources have indicated to me that El Cellar de Can Roca has exchanged places with Noma to reach number 1. Another highly talked about restaurant is Frantzén / Lindeberg in Stockholm, Sweden, placed at position 20 in the 2012 list, making it the second highest entry behind Heston Blumenthal’s eatery, Dinner. Frantzén / Lindeberg comes widely recommended with experienced Michelin diner & blogger Elizabeth on Food rating it at 97/100, concluding:

It is almost to much to ask. But Frantzén/Lindeberg delivers on all fronts. What stayed with me most was the absolute calm and virtuosity with which the food was prepared in front of our eyes, from the first amuse bouche until the very last fermented garlic toffee-bite, as if nothing could be simpler than this.

Personally speaking, I don’t particularly think it’s going to be a great year for the Brits. Gordon Ramsay has switched PR companies again, to the restaurant PR equivalent of the Illuminati ( not quite as At first we feast site had it), so they now handle: Fat Duck group; Tetsuya (in Australia & Singapore); Gordon Ramsay Holdings; DOM (in Brazil); Bo Innovation; Obelix; Zuma and Restaurant Sat Bains to name a few. Despite the involvement of this PR heavy weight, the level of press interest in the UK scene has dipped significantly this year, when you compare the amount of attention that say, The Ledbury got 2 years ago. I’ll be surprised to see any great moves by the UK restaurant establishment, except for maybe Dinner by Heston or Bar Boulud, where post event parties were held last year and Zuma, where the chefs lunch was located the following day.

As ever, the miraculous availability of places for restaurants that only have a handful of tables, never ceases to amaze me. The tactics of the Scandinavian tourist boards, has been to somehow make these exclusive seats available, if you’re one of the 900+ strong army of judges. On more than one occasion, I’ve heard how journalists have managed to score spots. So journalists, don’t slate bloggers when in actual fact you’re worse than us when it comes to flexing potential influence. I’d expect to see the likes of Fäviken rise significantly this year; the publication of a well received book & the exclusivity that the tiny restaurant affords, gives you all the desirability required to be noticed. However, Fäviken, I believe will buck the trend for the foraging restaurants. It’s been 3 years since Noma made the top spot & I believe that particular style of food has gone as far as it can. After the decidedly mixed reviews of Noma at Claridges, ants in a jar springs to mind, have people finally seen it for what it is? For those that missed out on the whole London experience in 2012, I can reveal that Noma are apparently considering a repeat performance this summer. Other movers; on the whole I’m hoping to see more from the Asian contingent. Self proclaimed ‘Demon chef’ Alvin Leung’s Bo Innovation in London,has had very ‘Marmite’ type reviews, which possibly doesn’t bode well for the original, more established mothership in Hong Kong. But I believe the main winners will again be the Spanish, so expect promotions for El Cellar de Can Roca, Mugaritz & Arzak to name a few.

Other winners which have already been announced in the run up to the big night:

• Alain Ducasse – Lifetime achievement award.
• Nadia Santini (Dal Pescatore, Italy)  – Best female chef.

As with any list or guide, it is flawed & not definitive (yes, even yours Hardens!). Many will point to the array of press junkets & how easy it is to get a table (many of which are complimentary) at such exclusive eateries for the judges. But I’ve studied The World’s 50 Best list for a number of years now, and it’s a celebration of great restaurants. Yes, Noma probably isn’t going to be everybody’s bag, mine included, but is it doing something different and excelling at it? Yes is the firm answer. Is Rene Redzepi the best chef in the world, as proclaimed on the front cover of Observer Food Monthly? No, no he isn’t, he’s the chef/owner of what is currently the best restaurant as defined by 900+ people and that’s the point; it’s a team game. It isn’t just about the food, it’s everything, the attention to detail, ambiance, the staff, etc.  I’ve also asked around & there doesn’t appear to be a full list of the 900+ people who are judging these restaurants, yes you can see who chairs each region on the Worlds 50 Best site & their manifesto, but nothing really more than that. Interestingly, the 50 Best have now listed the main rules on voting, maybe trying to go some way to extinguish Will Drew’s comments about not actually having to have eaten in a restaurant to vote for it.

As taken from the Worlds 50 Best website:

• Voting is strictly confidential before the awards’ announcement
• Panellists vote for 7 restaurants, at least 3 must be outside their region
• Voters must have eaten in the restaurants they nominate in the last 18 months
• Voters are not permitted to vote for restaurants they own or have an interest in
• Nominations must be made for the restaurant, not for the restaurateur or the chef
• Panellists submit their 7 choices in order of preference (and is used to decide on positions in the event of a tie)
• Other than this there are “no rules”.

So will this list cause controversy? Maybe for a week or so, then it’ll be accepted & used as part of the PR guff that gets sent out on a weekly basis. Ultimately, as The Guardian’s restaurant critic & World’s 50 Best former UK chair, Jay Rayner said on this very blog:

IT’S JUST A BLOODY LIST. One we love arguing about. Everybody should calm down a bit.

I’ve tried to keep my mouth shut but @cheflukethomas you are an embarrassment to this trade you give chefs a bad name you silly little boy.. @TomKneale

@cheflukethomas what’s it like to have 90% of the honest hardworking chefs out there hate you!!!!! Try and answer that genuinely ? @ChefRoss1

Watching Britain’s youngest chef on BBC3, what a joke!! Learn your craft first… PR stunt @William_Curley

But when you break the 60minutes down it wasn’t just bad, it was terrible & terrifying at the same time. To say that Luke Thomas or his PR machine has stretched the truth a little is a mild understatement. Most chefs that want to climb the culinary tree often go & do stages, that is to say you work for free to experience different kitchens, pick up ideas, etc. No chef worth their salt considers this working or employment. Yet from Mr Thomas’ own blog, which has been regurgitated many times since as a bio states:

Since winning FutureChef 2009 at just 15, Luke Thomas, recently turned 17, has gone on to secure opportunities to work with some of the UK’s most outstanding chefs, including Heston Blumenthal, Gary Rhodes, Brian Turner and Simon Radley

The massaging of the truth was really only the start of it; in the first 10-15minutes Luke Thomas came across all Gordon Ramsay,something akin to the early episodes of boiling point. Of course the difference between the two is a gapping void in terms of everything kitchen related, yet Mr Thomas continued to eff & jeff his way through the programme.

Then Mr Mark Fuller made an appearance; now if like me you’ve been around the catering industry a while, Mr Fuller requires no introduction. His no-nonsense approach to getting things done precedes him like nobody else I know of in the trade. Yet in this programme he was constantly frank about how

every restaurant needs a PR angle

and that Luke Thomas was his one for Sanctum on the green. But what else was just astonishing was how Mr Fuller repeatedly tried to nurture the young chef into being able to ‘run’ the business. So it was a harsh lesson for the young chef, when the Bank of Mark Fuller stopped the seemingly bottomless pit of cash flowing into Sanctum on the green.

Besides the precocious teenage chef, the other two key players in this sorry saga: Mark Fuller and Borra Garson (a talent agent responsible for the early days of Jamie Oliver’s career), both declared that they signed up Mr Thomas before even tasting his food. Absolutely remarkable, predominately because any chef with an even half decent background will tell you that the interview process will involve at least two meetings and a cook off, to display your culinary wares. So how did Luke Thomas manage to convince two industry hardened individuals to sign him up, principally on a whim & for PR value?

One of the more interesting highlights was Mr Thomas paying a visit to the troubled Michelin starred chef Tom Aikens. Mr Aikens past is well documented concerning his downfall, & he talks candidly about the pressures he was under at the age of 26 and achieving 2Michelin stars. Yet in the cab ride home Mr Thomas glosses over the these wise words of wisdom & warning from Mr Aikens, instead considering himself to be in the same ballpark of talent and selectively editing what he’s taken from the experience. Even in Mr Aikens eye’s, Luke is too young for the position he’s in and advises to get more experience.

With the explosion of social media it’s never been easier to follow your favourite chefs, particular on Twitter and the silence from the rest of Mr Thomas’ Great British Menu competitors was deafening, Daniel Clifford of the 2Michelin starred Midsummer House tweeted:

The telly is ok. Inly saw 10 mins then gave up. I feel sorry for him

Whilst Tom Aikens tweeted:

On I player but judging by some of your comments ladies & gentlemen it might not be worth it …. A few expletives going around …

But that was it, and this is part of the problem. He’d roundly had his ass handed to him on Great British Menu by the talented Michelin starred Richard Davis, yet Mr Thomas (and his PR machine) has openly set himself up as an award winning chef, but really what awards has he won? None with an credibility connected with running a professional kitchen; no rosettes or even a listing for Luke’s Dining Room in the Michelin guide, a point that Mr Fuller conceded. And this is the point, when you want to be in the Michelin guide, you don’t just open the doors and expect them to come. It’s widely known that you have to get in touch with the little red book people, send a copy of the menu, a CV of employment & a covering letter. This is where Mr Thomas will find it hard; Michelin aren’t interested in where you’ve staged, they’re interested in longevity, stability & so on and Luke Thomas just can’t show that.

The closing credits proclaimed that:

Twelve months after taking over the restaurant Luke has now managed to turn it into a profitable business.

As Luke’s Dining Room & Sanctum on the green are trading as two separate entities it’s hard to define if this statement is actually true. But what I can say for sure, is based on the information at Companies House is that Sanctum on the green actually has £1.1million negative value. Where as Luke’s Dining Room has yet to file any accounts as it was only registered as a company on the 19th of March this year. Luke Thomas isn’t a director of either company, so to open the documentary by saying ‘This is my restaurant’ is slightly mis-leading at best.

Whilst the cynic in me will look at Luke Thomas in his current position & just wonder how this happened, part of me knows he isn’t a patch on Robert Thompson or Aiden Byrne, the two other contenders for the youngest Michelin starred chef, and this is crucial for Mr Thomas to understand. Thompson & Byrne gathered their stars whilst working under a more experienced mentor figures, Thompson was Head chef at 22 in a 2Michelin starred restaurant and 23 when he achieved a star in his own right at The Hamborough.

I don’t want to be an advocate of the school of hard knocks, but as some chefs tweeted on Wednesday night, ‘Luke you haven’t earned your stripes’ and I tend to agree with them. My only real concern is where does Mr Thomas go when his PR value drops?

Not long after I posted about “James Sommerin & The Crown at Whitebrook”, I received an email concerning the post, from Mr Sommerin himself. I offered a phone number with which to discuss this & other releases, but nothing. That was over a month ago, and in light of this & other events I’m now bored of the tail wagging the dog.

James Sommerin will be re-locating to Penarth, as I said in my earlier post. But not at Holm House, where work seems to have stagnated on their mid March opening date. Instead Mr Sommerin will be opening in a brand new complex called Beachcliff ,on the Esplanade in Penarth. I can reveal there are three units on the ground floor, one of which is ear marked to be a gym at 215m². Then there are two units which are classed as for A3 use ( for food & drink), one at 120m² and the second is at 257m². However, it appears that none of these ground floor units are for Mr Sommerin; no, it appears that his restaurant will be on the first floor, utilising the four large windows which will give diners views over the Severn estuary.

A view of the site as it has been for close to two years © Penarth Daily News

The development will also be home to four houses, with an asking price starting in the region of £1.2million, depending on where you look, with two of the units already sold.

According to the plans submitted to the Vale of Glamorgan planning authority, the kitchen will be to the rear of the building & occupy somewhere in the region of 15-20% of that floor’s square footage. The one fly in the ointment is that one of the million pound plus homes sits directly above the restaurant, but not to worry as it appears that it will belong to developer, Richard Hayward.

The Beachcliff development has been a controversial project virtually from the word go, & has been a blight on Penarth’s glorious Victorian esplanade for years. The sooner it’s completed, the better, seems to be the general consensus of opinion locally.

So you’re going to want to know dimensions. Well, a great placed source has told ChefHermes.com James Sommerin’s restaurant is going to be 100covers, plus a Chef’s table in or just off the kitchen. There is also a rumour of six letting bedrooms, although I can’t see these on the plans submitted. Opening date is expected to be in the region of October, although anybody that knows the Beachcliff development would ask which October.

As usual I’d like to wish Mr Sommerin & all concerned the very best for the future in their latest venture.

With Easter weekend just behind us, where there were a plethora of excellent food festivals taking place: Broadstairs (which is on again in October); Real Food festival – Street Food (more throughout the year); Brighton food & drink festival & The Galway food festival in Eire.

Possible highlights for food festivals through April: Exeter Festival of South West food & drink; West Waterfood food festival in Eire; Crabstock in Northhants and the Cheese & Wine festival in London.

Notable food dates in April: National Garlic day on Friday 19th April & Food Hydrocolloid Conference 2013 in the USA

Click to be taken to the interactive food festival calendar page, where more details for each festival are available.

• Eggs – signifies rebirth
• Ham – signifies luck
• Lamb – signifies sacrifice
• Bread & Cakes – signifies fertility

Easter breads & cakes are wide spread across Europe, with Simnel cake being the most synonymous. Hot cross buns are another bread / cake which usually only makes an appearance this time of year. Other than the common link of the dried fruit & spices, both contain eggs which were forbidden by the Catholic church during lent. Hot cross buns also have a special non religious meaning in the UK. The institutionalisation of these small yeast buns dates back to Tudor times, when a London bylaw was introduced forbidding the sale of such buns except on Good Friday, at Christmas, and at burials.

So here are my Easter recipes, many will note that I tend to use Five spice over mixed spice, it’s a personal preference as it tends to make the products that just a little bit more fragrant.

Picture from my Instagram feed feed, titled “they’re not dunkable people”

Easter Biscuits

•  460g Unsalted butter, softened to room temperature
• 340g Caster sugar + extra from sprinkling
• 70g Egg yolk (about 4)
• 800g Plain flour
• 2 tsp Five spice
• 2 tsp Ground cinnamon
• 1 tsp Ground nutmeg
• 100ml Milk
• 240g Mixed dried fruit

In a kitchen mixer on a high speed, cream the butter & sugar together until pale.

Reduce the speed to minimum and slowly add the egg yolks.

Remove the dough from the machine and fold in the flour, spices & dried fruit with a metal spoon.

Then add the 100ml of milk to make the dough soft enough to use.

Rest in the fridge for a minimum of 1 hour.

Roll & cut out biscuit dough to 1½ times the thickness of a £1 coin, cut using pastry cutters and rest in the fridge whilst your oven is pre-heating to 180°C.

Bake for 15minutes at 180°C and as soon as you remove from the oven, sprinkle with caster sugar.

 Hot Cross Buns

• 1.5kg Strong flour
• 100g Yeast
• 90g Sugar
• 15g Salt
• 6 Eggs
• 500ml Warm water (40ºC)
• 240g Butter, diced at room temperature
• 350g Mixed peel
• 100g Sultanas
• 45g Five spice
• 20g Ground cinnamon
• 2 tablespoons Golden syrup

Dissolve the yeast in the warm warm & wait until it starts to ferment. Pre-heat the oven to 200°C.

In a mixer with the dough hook attachment, combine the  flour, yeast solution, sugar and eggs, mixing to a dough for 10 minutes on a medium speed.

Next gradually add the butter and mix until  the dough comes away from the sides of the bowl cleanly.

Mix in remainder of ingredients (except the Golden syrup) and weigh the dough out into 60g balls. Roll as you would for dinner rolls and prove on a lightly greased tray. Prove until they’re double in size.

Prepare cross paste by making  a paste with water & plain flour, using a piping bag, pipe the cross onto the proved dough balls.

Bake for 15minutes at 200°C. When cooked, remove from the oven, warm the golden syrup and liberally brush the hot cross buns with the golden syrup.

Wait to cool.

My final recipe is a hybrid, not quite a cake (despite its name) & not quite a biscuit either.

Easter Cakes

• 250g Butter
• 165 Caster sugar
• 3 Eggs
• 450g Plain flour
• 2 tsp Baking powder
• 100g Mixed dried fruit
• 100g Sultanas
• 1 tsp Ground cassia
• 1 tsp Ground nutmeg

Pre-heat the oven to 200°C.

Sieve together the flour, baking powder & spices, and then rub in the butter with your finger tips.

Combine and then add the fruits.

Add the eggs and bring together as a dough.

Rest in the fridge for 1hour before rolling out.

Roll out to a thickness of ½cm, egg wash & dust with sugar. Bake for 12-14minutes at 200°C.

Happy Easter from ChefHermes.com

The more that you use Twitter as a tool, the more people’s agendas become apparent, and if you’re doing something a little different; a bit on the edge, then you’re not going to fit in. I left one such website for this & other reasons, & started ChefHermes.com. Everything that you see me tweet or even post on here & twitter would have appeared on that website. And as I’ve said on more than one occasion, it’s content I would like to read myself; that’s the general rule for the blog. When I started out solo I was persecuted by former forum dwellers, ‘How dare he leave?’, but they failed to see the bigger picture & jealousy ensued.

People on Twitter talk about Trolling; because somebody has a difference of opinion to you & likes to passionately discuss it doesn’t make them a Troll. Personal experience? Yep, after the first two you know what the routine is to get them shut down, you become more efficient at it & what they say just rolls away.
The more and more people perceive that I have influence the harder it becomes to like Twitter, I’ve re-tweeted job vacancies, links to charity pages and so the list goes on. I’d like to think that as my followers grew in number that it was giving back in some small way. But then come the hidden agendas: some I agreed with; some I don’t and some which, in my opinion where just sloppy & lazy journalism, out to protect vested interests. And this is where Twitter can come into its own, you can approach these people directly, question their motives and probe their techniques. Rarely is there anywhere to hide, and that has been my problem. I’ve pushed & pushed, determined to get answers, believing that I was right, maybe becoming blinded by self-importance. Then the eureka moment arrived, whilst slotting a journalist back in her place during a passionate discussion over the merits of James Martin being a judge for the Roux Scholarship:

@JanetHarmer dont really say there can be any winners or losers, just differing opinions – all of which are valid.

Funny, she didn’t reply; and that’s the point. Twitter is rarely black & white, it’s all a bit grey.
As a final note, if you’re reading this and thinking ‘cor, don’t think I’ll bother with Twitter’; please do, try it. I’ve had conversations, opportunities & encountered some wonderful people; witty, charming, helpful, funny, passionate and so the list goes on; with over 200 million users there is bound to be a bunch of people out there for you.

As for me? I’ll re-evaluate the situation after a period of time, have a cull of the people I follow and utilise the myriad of information flowing through my timeline to help me move forward and return a better tweeter.

It’s really hard to work out who started throwing the insults first, whether it was Johnnie Mountain telling Sophie Michell ‘that she needed to lose some weight & couldn’t cook’, or that Miss Michell had emailed Miss Marshman:

….A little bit of advice, you are at the start of your career, being rude and disrespectful to people in the industry will get you nowhere. You’re Twitter page is full of abuse for chefs like Marcus Wareing, who is actually incredibly good at what he does and very much respected. You need to wake up and realise that what seems like fun and games and a good way to be part of JM’s little pig sty could actually, in the long term damage you….

Miss Michell also claimed that she was being:

..trolled and stalked by Johhnie Mountain..

If she really knew what being trolled was, it might have gotten a bit of sympathy; but as Miss Michell clearly doesn’t, it wont.

It really is all playground stuff with handbags at dawn, so why Gizzi Erskine got involved is beyond me. She tweeted:

And I suppose that’s the measure of this, Miss Erskine & Miss Michell are TV cooks; book writers, not chefs, well not in the conventional use of the word. While the whole thing is 6 of one & half a dozen of t’other, Mr Mountain felt compelled write it all down & ask if I’d post it. Having spent 30minutes on the phone with him today & read some of Johnnie’s timeline, there is a sense of regret coupled with frustration over TV cooks & their ilk.

Here is Johnnie Mountain’s post, everything in it are his views, & not necessarily those of anybody connected with ChefHermes.com.

In My Honest Opinion….

After yesterday’s (Monday 18th March) twitter debacle, I felt compelled to put ‘pen to paper’….
For those that really know me, I am sure you understand, for those that don’t, well here goes.
I have a problem with people who profess to be something that they are clearly not, you know what I am talking about, thieves, robbers, muggers of old ladies, bullies and the likes….. and although this sounds a little over the top when I see so-called ‘celebrity chef’s’ informing the nation of cooking tips or techniques that are so wrong, it infuriates me.
I know I only received a famous ‘2’ from Marcus Wareing and therefore in some people’s opinion, who the f*ck am I?
Well I’ll tell you who the f*ck I am, I have worked in the catering business for over 25 years, working for some of the best in the business and certainly some of the worst in the industry, I started building my own restaurants 13 years ago and sure I have had a couple of failures, but at least I tried. Most of my life before this I was a drunk, a really shitty, aggressive, bullying alcoholic!!
After marriage to my beautiful wife Manjri and the birth of our children becoming a truthful person became imperative….why would you bring another human into this world and fill their heads full of shit??
Then the TV world approached me, it wasn’t me running to them and after a number of years and a number of requests I decided to go for it….Borra Garson was at the top of my list as an agent and after she kindly accepted me into her ‘fold’ a couple of opportunities came my way. This is when the problems started, meeting and seeing people on television that had little knowledge and yet they were very popular with the General Public, I thought WTF, or rather Why the F*ck do people still watch them?? Believing the information that these ‘chef’s’ give out really, really hurts. It hurts because it’s not true or accurate and falling back into the realms of being ‘false’
Well if that’s the world we live in, so be it. F*ck television, they didn’t really like me in the first place!!…
So for all you cyclists that ride through red lights, motorcyclists (which I am one!!) that ride down cycle lanes, pedestrians that cross the road without looking, cheats, womaniser’s, abuser’s and all you so-called, wannabe, successful(or not) TV Chef’s……F*CK YOU and Goodnight!!

Noma

Noma & it’s chef, Rene Redzepi, have basically been hailed as the second coming, since dislodging el Bulli from the summit of the 50Best Restaurant list in 2010 (by the way, it was leaked here first). An alumni of el Bulli, Redzepi has employed this knowledge & technique, couple with his love for all things foraged & local. Although his 10 day pop-up appearance at Claridges in London, was less well received by a general paying public being charged £195 per person plus drinks.

Norovirus

Norovirus comes in the guise of a few names: Winter vomitting bug & Roskilde Sickness. It is in actual fact a genetically diverse group of single-stranded RNA (An RNA virus is a virus that has RNA (ribonucleic acid) as its genetic material.), non-enveloped viruses in the Caliciviridae family. which sounds long winded, but essentially means to retard it you should take the following steps according to the HPA (Health Protection Agency):

Good hygiene helps limit outbreaks. Wash your hands with soap and water after contact with someone who is ill, and after using the toilet, especially if you have symptoms.

At home, clean hard surfaces with detergent then disinfect with a bleach solution, especially around the toilet, and clean up vomit promptly, to reduce risk of infection.

Where a bleach solution is mentioned, it requires a 1.5% – 7.5% solution of household bleach in water to sanitise work surfaces which may have been exposed to pathogens. Hand washing with soap and water is an effective method for reducing the transmission of norovirus.

So the scene is set, and hopefully I can lay out the facts in a timeline fashion for you.

• Noma had its norovirus outbreak in week 7 (February 12th – 16th, the restaurant is closed Monday & Sunday).
• Initial indication comes in the form of an email from a Danish couple, to inform Noma they had become ill after dining there, but goes unread by somebody who can read Danish until the 18th.
• Second email arrives from another couple complaining of illness. Both emails arrive on 14th & 15th February; the two couples dined at Noma on 12th & 13th respectively.
• 15th February, an un-named kitchen assistant suffers from vomiting & illness after service and is advised not to come to work the following day.
• On 20th February, Noma report these two customer outbreaks to  The Danish Veterinary and Food Administration (DVFA), but not the kitchen assistant incident.
• After inspection by the authorities, they downgrade Noma’s hygiene rating from 1(best) to 2 on a 1-4 scale.
• Story breaks in the mainstream Danish media with newspaper ‘Politiken‘ first on the 8th of March
• 10th March, Noma releases statement on the norovirus outbreak on their website.
• The same day: Journalist, Lisa Abend writes article for Time magazine clearly with support from Rene Redzepi.
• 11th March, toll rises to 72*.

Some of you are probably asking why I’ve mentioned the Abend/Time article. I have lost any respect for the author of that article, and quiet frankly just stops short of an advertorial for the Danish eatery.

The Abend/Time article paints a picture that Noma was unlucky, and that due to the high profile of Noma the story has been exaggerated. The facts are these;

• 72* people had food poisoning from Noma because systems failed.
• The sink that didn’t have hot water was only fixed after, according to DVFA, their visit – a full week after the incident first broke.
• The food which was prepared by the un-named kitchen assistant (chilli & dill at least, according to the DVFA report) wasn’t destroyed. But used in staff food the following Tuesday, a full 4 days after he/she had reported their illness & giving potential to spread the virus within the team .
• Is any of this mentioned in the Abend/Time article? No, instead the author seems to care about the fact that Rene Redzepi picked up 50 new twitter followers in an hour, because Justin Bieber might be coming for dinner.

Dear friends thank you for your concern. Here are the facts! Best wishes Rene Redzepi and the entire noma crew http://noma.dk/news/

We have been in direct contact with all the customers affected.

@ReneRedzepiNoma you wrote that all guests were contacted? We got sick.really sick.. And were not contacted.

The menu that started all this of for me was this extract:

Grade ‘A’ foie gras and chicken liver parfait

or as I tweeted about it:

The absolute wankyness of menu writing just astounds sometimes”Grade A foie gras & chicken liver parfait”would you tell ppl you use B grade?

Then of course came a suggestion from a follower:

an explosion of cumin!…

tweeted Dave Mooney. Which I thought was just hilarious, coupled with the #BadMenuWriting (storified by Magnus Hultberg) rant from the ever entertaining Luke Mackay at the same time,  this post was born.

There have been many bugbears in my time as a chef, but none irritate me more than the use of the phrase:

Homemade

Homemade, conjures up the image of a sweet old lady lovingly spending all day crafting one particular element of your meal, the ice cream or shortbread biscuit. Let me tell you the reality is considerably different. Chefs who work, particularly in the higher accoladed echelons, in professional kitchens rarely lovingly craft anything. It is all about precision, excellence, following recipes to the most minute detail, timers constantly puncturing the tense atmosphere; and ultimately trying to please: owners; chef/patrons & egos. It often takes considerable man hours to produce quality food, let alone to even considered for a Michelin star; which many chefs are of the opinion is the pinnacle of their careers. So unless you have a mattress under the pastry section bench and you genuinely live in your kitchen, it isn’t homemade.

Next, try to avoid writing in a style which suggests you are doing a stock take for IKEA. I think you know the type, but circumnavigate words & phrases like:

• …rest on a bed of…
• …set on a pillow of…
• draped in curtains of …

Then there are the obvious cooking techniques that should be missing from menus as well:

• Oven roasted
• Oven baked

Just when I thought that the #BadMenuWriting was drawing to an end, Oisin Rogers, of the newly refurbished ‘The Ship’ in Wandsworth, tweeted a classic which deserves to be hung in any hall of shame:

Then there is always trying to over sell your product. If it’s a great chocolate fondant you do then just say Chocolate fondant, it may well be ‘indulgent’ & very good, but I doubt it is ‘world famous’  (again, two sets of words which should never be used). There are very few dishes which are truly world famous, but there are some if you mention them to anybody who has any level of serious interest in food, then they’d be able to link the dish to the chef, for example:

• Snail porridge – Heston Blumenthal
• Chocolate fondant (or Le coulant de chocolate, to give it its proper name) – Michel Bras
• Stuffed pigs trotter – Pierre Koffmann
• Lemon tart – Marco Pierre White

And so the list goes on.

Next up is a relatively new  phenomenon. Giving dishes vintages; I have a sneaking suspicion that this may have originated at Heston Blumenthal’s Fat Duck or the now defunked El Bulli, which at one point was the Mecca for all aspiring chefs. But even the mighty Fat Duck has only brought this in over time, presumably when they decide that a dish can evolve no further. See the examples below, a menu circa early 2000′s and a menu from more recent times.

Pleas click for a larger image.

 And a more recent menu from 2009. Please note there are only vintages on some dishes.

Click for a larger image

Now if you’re a chef & you do this, just have a really good think about it. Is that dish original, synonymous & unique to you? The answer, I would imagine is probably not. As I’ve eluded to in a previous post (Great British Menu 2012, where did it all go wrong.), very few chefs are truly ground breaking, so the rest of us should maybe stop trying to emulate them & think for ourselves.

Then there is the use of quotation marks, why bother? To use them to me at least says that I might be getting something that might remotely resemble food I might recognise. For example, on a 3Michelin starred restaurant’s website is …”Swiss Roll”. When I went to school a Swiss roll was a sponge dessert with a filling (usually jam and a n other), rolled up & sliced. How is it possible to conjure that simple basic dessert into something that is so radically different to the basic premise of rolled up flavoured sponge? Quite frankly with that type of arrogance the chef is in danger of disappearing up his own rectum.

Over the 25 years I’ve been a chef, I’ve dined out quite a lot. When I can I try to take away a copy of the menu. Sometimes they are signed by the chef, others they are not. Occasionally I flick through them as a trip down memory lane, but even now, most of them are timeless. And this is surely the point, which ever style of menu writing you have, like all good writing, if it’s done well it’ll be timeless.

I guess ultimately, the rule of K.I.S.S. is best applied to menu writing – Keep It Simple Stupid.

Here are a few examples of menus I’ve collected for your inspiration.

Le Champignon Sauvage, Lunch menu circa 1999.

Le Manoir au Quat Saison circa mid noughties part1, click for larger view.

Part 2, click for a larger view

Gidleigh Park, 2010, click for a larger image

ABaC, Barcelona. Click for a larger image

-post-

Curiously, almost coincidentally earlier in the week, another rumour also arrived via email concerning James Sommerin’s future.

This time it appeared that Mr Sommerin is shortly to be announced as Steve Smith’s replacement at The Devonshire Arms in Yorkshire.

James Sommerin has spent over 13 years at The Crown, 10 of which as Head chef. So today really is a monumental day. The Crown, under Mr Sommerin’s guidance, has held a coveted Michelin star for 6years and gathered the fairly recently awarded 3AA rosettes  as well. All this on top of his appearances on Great British Menu in 2009, where he beat Stephen Terry of the nearby Hardwick, to the final.

Having said all that, the progression of the food at The Crown unfortunately hasn’t been enough to carry the brand. In 2011, after successfully branching out to Celtic Manor, The Crown decided to embark on more city center dining with The Crown Social & former 2Michelin starred chef Martin Blunos at the stoves. It closed within the year to very mixed reviews. A year later James Sommerin’s initial offshoot at Celtic Manor had also closed. So clearly it’s a tough nut to crack in and around the Welsh capital.

Mr Sommerin has also been linked to the affluent area of Penarth for a number of years & specifically one property called Holm House. Recently Holm House has been purchased for a reputed £1.2million & this could possibly the preferred avenue for Mr Sommerin, as his family are settled in Wales.

I can honestly say having been fortunate to have eaten Mr Sommerin’s food at the Slow Food Wales event last year,& that it’s a good fit with the Dev over Holm House.

ChefHermes.com would like to wish him all the best for the future.

W: The Crown at Whitebrook

Update:

Not long after this post was published, I received an email from James Sommerin & another source, who had both read the post. Whilst Mr Sommerin had read the post & was flattered by the attention, he informed me that developments where at a crucial stage.

I’ve since learned from a different source that Mr Sommerin isn’t going to either the Devonshire Arms or Holm House & as soon as Mr Sommerin gives me the all clear, I’ll publish the information I have. Reading back Mr Sommerin’s tweet:

Thanks for all the great comments. I’m not going anywhere,Wales is home. Rise like the Phoenix, hopefully won’t be long. #watchthisspace

Although it may seem cryptic, he’s not kidding when he talks about “Rise like the Phoenix”.

2nd Update: 

New post: James Sommerin – “Rise like the phoenix”